Ugh. Only me.

I am an actor so, naturally, I work in retail to, you know, pay bills and survive. Christmas is both the best and worst time of the year for me. It is the best because it's Christmas and that is always a good time but it is also the worst because apparently Christmas fills people with rage and they take that rage out on the guy who folds hoodies for eight hours a day. That guy is me.

The other day, I decided to bravely venture to the crowded food court to eat some lunch. By some act of God I found a vacant seat and sat down. I'm not two bites into my Chubby Chicken sandwich (A&W, please come up with a better name for your chicken) when I notice the Hottness is sitting at a table across from me. This young man has a remarkably sensible haircut and is wearing a tie. I always welcome ties.

We make eye contact.

The contact of eyes continues for longer than a mistake.

What happens next has me gasping for air. He walks over to my table and sits. Do things like this still happen? Do people randomly meet in food courts? And do people have the nerve to actually make a move?

I'm already planning our gay wedding by the time he is sitting. I smile. He smiles back. ADORABLE.

Then he reaches into his bag (probably to grab his mother's engagement ring because he is certain I am the one he has been searching for) and pulls out a black book and some pamphlets.

Thankfully, I now know a lot more about the church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.

Ugh. Real life.